ALMOST DONE

THIS HAS BEEN AN INCREDIBLE JOURNEY. I HAVE LEARNED SO MUCH. PATIENCE, LOVE OF MYSELF, ACCEPTENCE, COMPASSION, COURAGE, NON JUDGEMENT, ESPECIALLY WITH MY VULNERABILITY. MY EYES HAVE NEVER LEAKED THIS MUCH. MY DOCTOR WANTED ME TO HAVE TWO MORE TREATMENTS SINCE I WAS DOING SO WELL. I WAS PRETTY SURPRISED AT MY DISAPPOINTMENT. I HAD NO IDEA HOW MUCH I WAS HOLDING ON TO THAT LAST DATE. I HAVE ONE MORE, FEB 27TH AND MY PORT COMES OUT FEB 24TH. THIS LAST TREATMENT MY PORT DID NOT WORK, I THINK BECAUSE I HAVE HAD SUCH A TERRIBLE COLD AND I HAVE BEEN COUPHING SO MUCH. IM LOOKING FORWARD TO HAVING MY PORT OUT, IT HAS DONE ITS JOB BUT IT HAS BEEN SO TENDER AND THROBBING. I HAVE REALLY LEARNED ABOUT DEPRESSION. SOMETIMES I GO INTO THIS DEEP DARK HOLE AND I AM AFRAID I WONT COME OUT OF IT. THE BEST THING I HAVE LEARNED FROM THE BOOK THE NEW EARTH IS NOT TO JUDGE MYSELF. WHEN I DONT JUDGE MYSELF I COME OUT OF IT SOONER. I FEEL LIKE IM KIND OF RAMBLING BUT IF ANYONE HAS ANY QUESTIONS OR JUST WANTS TO SAY SOMETHING I WOULD GREATLY APPRECIATE IT. THANKS, DEB